I shared this in an email to my subscribers this week and had so much positive feedback that I wanted to share as a blog too. If you want to receive my newsletter you can do so here and you will get my ‘secrets’ video series too!HERE
Before I share this with you I want share that I truly feel, as mothers and going through motherhood that the best relationship advice I can share with you is that you have to start with having the best ‘love affair’ with YOURSELF. I am not speaking in a shallow sense. I am speaking about an ongoing relationship where you nurture yourself, you work on growth, you love yourself, you have gratitude – there is a huge journey that starts with ourselves and if you do that, we can then serve other relationships on a much higher frequency. Motherhood can be tough. Marriage can be tough. Kids can be tough. Friendships can be tough. Family can be tough. It’s 100% worth it to work on YOU, that is something I can promise that can improve all your other relationships and to have basically a happier life.
My mum has been visiting for the last week. I saw her last about 4 years ago. She lives in Australia (where I grew up) and I live in Tel Aviv (I have been here 12+ years).
It’s been very interesting. She lives alone and I live with 4 other extremely active ADHD (incl myself) humans.
It’s loud. It’s intense. Lots of big personalities and it’s Summer vacation here.
So what I am learning about during this time is that we all have our set ways. We all have our own energy. We all need our own boundaries and we must remember the key to a successful relationship (with kids, parents, spouses) is COMMUNICATION.
There was an incident and and the end I said “mum, if you are frustrated, it’s probably best that you actually come to me, sit down and share it with me so that I can address it”.
What I see, especially from mums *including myself – is that we let things get to the edge, we think ‘we can handle it’. Then BOOM one thing can set us off. I know that you are reading this and know what I mean. Because I think part of our nature as a mother is to handle everything, no matter what.
The problem here is that our partners (so I am focusing on relationships in the home right now) or anyone under the same roof – they can’t read minds. So unless there is a civilized form of communication BEFORE the meltdown – shit usually hits the fan.
So this is just a reminder, maybe you need it, maybe you don’t. But if there is something brewing. Invite that other person for a tea, wine, dinner and let them know you have a few things you’d love to share – let them know what the challenges are right now.
Firstly YOU will feel better.
Secondly, they will understand the situation better.
Thirdly, you may just find a solution as well!
If you want to get deeper, book a call with me, let’s chat! Nicole’s Calendar